1. Tempting as it is, don’t think it’s okay to empty that half bottle of vodka into a plastic water bottle and put it in your suitcase. It’s not. You schmuck. Just buy a new bottle there! Even though you’ve cleverly wrapped it in plastic, it’s still going to leak. I learnt this the hard way, although, fortunately enough, I had the good sense to just double check it when I got to the airport and it had only soaked through one top. Nothing like the stench of vodka to kick things off in the morning. I suppose, if I’m going to be a pirate, it’s okay that I smell like one too.
2. Men smell really nice at airports. I don’t know why. But I LIKE it.
3. I’m a total creep for smelling men at airports.
4. I’m really good at Sudoku.
5. Tea is so much better than coffee. It’s like half the price and you get like THREE cups.
6. I’m a total cheapskate.
7. I’m missing that vodka already, I’m going to Tiger tonight and NOW I’m going to have to make an extra trip to the bottle store. How irrrrritating.
8. No eight, just seven. I feel there should be a number 8, and a 9, and 10. But there’s not. Lucky number seven. OLEH!
