awkward dinner dates

Okay, so how's this for an awkward evening... Our delightful deckhand spent all afternoon begging me to come out to dinner with him, to the point of actually being quite annoying about it (stay tuned for WHY). I really didn't feel like it, I was in work mode (scraggy leggings, hair tied up, old tshirt kind of mode) and, after my recent splurging activities, I didn't want to spend any more money. Anyways, he was so persistent, I eventually just thought, oh go on then, whhhhy not. I got all prettied up and when we got there, had a MASSIVE change of heart and thought ooooh let's go to that NICE restaurant over THERE. I decided that instead of ordering the least expensive option on the menu (which always seems to be the most unhealthy too, don't you hate that?), I would really just GO for gold, give the cat the canary, really TREAT myself and order a nice healthy grilled seafood platter and a salad, except, well, it turns out that it wasn't ME treating myself... it was HIM (a sorry-my-new-girlfriend-is-such-a-horrible-cow and belated birthday treat), I only found this out when the bill came. He totally should have said something BEFORE I went and ordered the most expensive thing on the menu, howww awkward.

Anyways, that wasn't the only awkward thing that happened... We were chatting away, when he got an email from his ex girlfriend (who he broke up with just a few weeks ago). You know it's serious when it's an EMAIL (believe me, I've been that girl that sends THAT email, you don't wanna BE that girl that sends THAT email, just don't go there, sista). And then, the most awkward thing happened, he started, now you're not gonna believe this, but he started... CRYING. Proper crying, ACTUAL tears. He caught me WAY off guard there. What are you supposed to DO when that happens? I decided on an awkward little pat on the shoulder (?), then he did the manly throat clearing thing and asked if I wanted more wine and then we pretended it never happened. Mmm so how's your pasta then is it GOOD?! Righto do you know what an aardvark is? What's an aardvark in Italian? You seen one before? They're quite cute I once saw one having surgery i'm not even joking are you gonna have dessert do you think the wind will die down what's the time should we GO are you finished? That's the kind of thing I do in situations like that, it's great, I have a gift